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8 weeks of blackberry removal?

~ 2.5 minutes to read

ℹ️ This is an encouraging post, where I speak courage to myself to do the tasks I'm avoiding. Inspired by this quote:
When one is not following through with one's tasks, it is not because one is without ability. Adlerian psychology tells us that the issue here is not one of ability but simply that "one has lost the courage to face one's tasks." And if that is the case, the thing to do before anything else is to recover that lost courage. — The Courage to Be Disliked, Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi (185)

the task at hand

Our yards (back, front, side) are overgrown with blackberries. They've been this way since we moved in 6 years ago, although at first they probably weren't as bad. But now, the brush is taller than me and has spread to nearly every corner. There are a few areas that I have cleared successfully, or mostly successfully (there are still some blackberries, but they're easy to cut back). If I had to guess, it will take 300 hours of work. I have no clue if that's accurate, but that's what my brain thinks, literally hundreds of hours.

the fear

It's not that I'm scared of the blackberries. Yes, they're thorny and can hurt you if you grab them too hard. I don't think fear is the right word here. What it is, is overwhelming. Standing out there looking at all of them, it feels a bit like drowning. I've tried every year to make a dent, and some years I have. The front yard is not as overgrown as it used to be. And one year I cut back a good chunk in the backyard, but not maintaining it meant that they've grown back. There's also plenty of guilt and shame that comes up when I think of or look at the yard. I feel like a total failure when I see it.

the courage

I think the courage I need here is actually a system. For getting me outside and facing the blackberries and for disposing of them. The end of summer is Sept 22, however, I'm giving myself to the week before that. So I have just about 8 weeks. My goal is to be out in the yard clearing blackberries for an hour every day, probably in the evening during golden hour. I know it seems stupid to do it this tedious way and not rent a big, strong machine to knock everything out at once. I'll probably try to wrangle my partner to do that with me one or two days in the next 50ish, but I don't think it's in the cards for us to rent something continuously until the job is done (yes, it's that abundant, we have a really big yard).

getting out there

I need to set up a station by our backdoor with my gloves, my clippers, my boots, a hat, a water bottle, and a timer. I think I also am going to walk around the yard every morning, not to battle the blackberries, but just to reacquaint myself with the space and try to let go of these feelings of guilt and shame I have around not taking care of it.

If I hit 100 hours by September 13, I'll let myself get a tattoo this year commemorating the big blackberry battle (probably a little blackberry flower).

And for each area of the yard, I think I'll get a reward, too, maybe:

In the past, I would listen to music or podcasts while working, as a way to distract myself and pass the time. I think I'm going to try not doing that this time though. I recently tried forest bathing for the first time, and there was something really nice about being so present in nature. I'm hoping that being present will, idk, make it easier or more enjoyable or something.

disposing them

I think it's going to be a mix of:

I'm hopeful that it won't actually take 300 hours, and that even 50 will make a huge difference. If you have any tips or words of encouragement, pls send 'em my way 💜

#blackberries #encouraging